I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
You've had your dick in my mouth. I don't think there are all that many barriers in our friendship at this point.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
i should probably stop thinking with my vagina, and start using that $70, 000 education i can't afford. what the fuck.
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
banged a milf last night. she left right after cause of parent teacher conferences this morning. victory.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sorry I got completely naked in your bed, but I feel our friendship has grown because of it.
I see myself subsisting on tequila for the next several days.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
I know I joke about running from my problems a lot but I'm 3 miles off-campus and need a ride
I am 11 times too hungover to give the eulogy
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