Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
turns out the website for Dick's Sporting goods is not "dicks.com". It was a win either way.
this is ridiculous... i look like a white version of MC Hammer...
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said "Lay the fuck down and ill show you how its done. Ill get us both off." I did. And she did. Best words ever said before sex.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Just taking a shit and realized the captain planet theme song is stuck in my head.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
Dont be alarmed when you come homeand see a guy handcuffed to your bed. His name is james. Ill uncuff him when I get home
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
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