What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
I just had to dig under a pile of condoms in my desk drawer to get to a blue book. Summer is officially over.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
He professed his love for me while I danced on a picnic table with a bottle of Absolut. I said thank you and walked away.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Life lesson 8263 if drinking a beer in the shower be careful when shampooing... Tresemme flavored rolling rock sucks
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Randomize
