that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Sorry you called when I was puking in a cheetos bag
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
In case you were wondering, taking me to see beauty and the beast in theaters would totally get you an unsolicited sloppy beej in the parking lot afterwards.
You should probably take note of that and make it happen.
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
Nobody in the ambulance liked me...
I LOVE DRINKING BOOZE OUT OF A FUCKING LAMP
I have nothing to lose. And a bunch of dick to gain.
Shit dude that sort of wholesale destruction can't just be done at the drop of a hat
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Right now he's sitting in the chair pointing to me to go away. He's trying to have quiet time with his penis.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
Almost ran out to the street bowl in hand when I hear the ice cream truck pull up outside.
Everything about that text makes me proud to be your sister.
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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