I told him he can't put it there till we're exclusive. That's totally The Relationship Hole.
Remeber, hes got nothing better to offer you than drunk words and hairy balls.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Gave up on finding an ashtray.... just started flicking it in my purse.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
Tbh the only thing I was fully concerned about from the dream was what type of fucked up parallel universe doesn't have Coca-Cola
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
This chick walked up to me in the bar and started making out with me, then grabbed my drink while I wasn't looking and walked off.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
Randomize
