I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
I negotiated the purchase of an entire tray of like 50 jello shots for $8.
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
There is nothing like getting stoned and spying on people with binoculars
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I just can't have sex with a guy who has nicer eyebrows than me
Getting drunk before noon on a Tuesday. When did this become my life? Did you know that a six-pack of Smirnoff is 2 liters?
This teachers last name is pfister and she did the fisting motion to help explain how to pronounce her name. This class might be good
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
Just specific performance'd my way into her pants. I literally said specific performance and that shit worked. Thanks B. Law!
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Are you 5:30 blackout again?
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
Cocaine bath bombs are a really bad idea
I can't. I'm going camping this weekend. I do have a life outside of your dick.
Randomize
