used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
i just taught a 3 year ld how to do a jager bomb, i cant wait to have kids
You can't use the, "think about your future" line when trying to convince me to save some weed for tomorrow.
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
You better of fucked him last night or do it now because he is buying all the roommates McDonald's.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
Sorry if this is weird, but please don't have sex in my truck. I get to be the first...
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
Woke up in bushes at UT didn't know I was Austin last night
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
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