my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The Shake Weight not only toned my arms but significantly improved my hand job form and efficiency.
I still can't figure out why that's not in the commercial.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
and she just brought her bike into the shower with her
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
GOIN TO BED BEFORE TEQUILA BLEEDS FROM MY EYEBALLS
I just told a bottle to be chill
and meant it
I spent the entire party sexting people's significant others for them because they were too drunk to do it themselves. I did quite well too. I should start a business
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
i love discovering the tokens of our drunkenness from the night before. it's like easter egg hunting. today: smashed pizza rolls in the sink.
Randomize
