that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
maybe you should start leaving anonymous bottles of booze on his doorstep with love notes attatched. that always gets me.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
you left a paper here that says 'to do list' but it looks like you just wrote "drink a bunch of cough syrup and watch Who's the Boss" like 60 times
WHY DO YOU ALWAYS PUT THE PLUG IN THE SINK BEFORE YOU PUKE IN IT
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
This place smells like bottom shelf liquor and broken dreams
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
OMG I COULD FUCK HIM FOR POT, THIS CHANGES THE WHOLE GAME.
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
