youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
i was wearing footie pjs. how could there be confusion as to who i hooked up with, thats not something you forget
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
She pinched my nipples out of nowhere as I was about to come... I think I found god
I'm getting high with a 50 year old car wash guy. Enough said.
My bed smells like the plague
You have to commit to sexting. You can't just quit right after I send you pictures of my asshole.
Seriously, come on.
I feel like there's a picture of my ass on the internet right now.
I hate you.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
