You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
She called it mighty mouse.. And from there it was down hill
I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
Random question, what's John-that-we-had-a-threesome-with's phone number? Don't necessarily need the full number, maybe just area code? Think I drunkenly ran into him last night and now I have texts from a John.
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
i think i left you like a 5 minute message about the mcchicken burger i was eating. I think I called wanting sex but the mcchicken burger was a lot more seducing.
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
Randomize
