Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
I just walked in on my roommate beating off with no pants on, an unbuttoned hawaiian shirt and a cowboy hat, and he weights 300 pounds
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
So I paid for the taxi using pennies and hair clips, no need to thank me.
I found a playlist on my ipod with only one song on it: gold digger. confused, but not surprised.
Well if your hearts not big enough, your penis certainly is. Just have a threesome
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
How do I convince my friend not to get tattoo tributes to her cats?
WHO DOES THAT
I told her it'd send up tons of red flags and she responded by telling me they're her babies. And she's sober.
I was the oldest, shortest, and soberest at the New Years party last night. My life sucks
Randomize
