It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
its simple. when his lips are on my clitoris i want to marry him. when they are speaking i want to kill him.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
I left my coke in the bird nest in the bathroom stall last night but I found it nest and all in my purse I love morning suprises
this st patricks day sucks
ill send jameson via bank tube 150+ miles
If you need to be the damsel in drunken distress make sure it's before 3.
Did you drink ALL that 151??
No. We drank all the jaeger... Then used the 151 to start the fire. We're also out of paper towels... And your hairspray is flammable.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
I think i should either cut my hair or buy a dildo.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
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