yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
he even offered to make my bed in the morning.
It was some time between the gurgles of her blowing me to us throwing up in the same bucket afterwards that I realized we would be doing this a lot.
Preparing for wine wednesday. How would you feel about improvising and starting a white russian wednesday tomorrow instead? you know, shake things up a bit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
they won't let me drive with my sombrero
I FUCKING SERVED PEOPLE AND POURDED JUGS AND GOT FREE BEEEEEEEERERTERRY
Yea you just drank all the Hookah water, then started talking gibberish about the Kool Aid you just drank.
I hear youre working today. To keep you entertained, ive compiled a list of condiments that my dick has NOT been slathered in since last Friday: Relish, and raspberry jam. That's right.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
he ran through my sliding door
in his defense that door gets complicated after 10 beers
Rumble strips road head = magical
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
I'm eating chicken wings naked and hungover at 10am... Happy bday to me
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
Randomize