I don't think ill make it tonight the floor wont let me walk
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
You invited the cop in for a "Celebrity shot"
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I'm at the bar, forgot my pants. Everyone's over reacting
I want to preface this by saying nothing happened, nothing is on fire. It is mere speculation. Do we have a fire extinguisher?
man sorry about that. It's like god was willing me to be an asshole. I haven't filled my quota for the day
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
I didn't want him to hear me sneaking in. The doggie door was the perfect solution.
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