Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
I wish i was in the wii world.
there's got to be a less slutty way to tell him the baby isn't his
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
the weed was in a baggy that had little penguins on it. i am so excited you have no idea
And "sexual slave/chef" was as it turns out not a real career choice...
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
Showerbowl immediately followed by pullups naked. I feel like fucking Tarzan
Just bought a waterproof mattress cover. Bring it on sophomore year.
dude, you were feeling up her boob for 20 minutes in front of the guy she was hitting on because you and her had an argument over who had bigger boobs.
hey man, it was for science okay.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
next time you go get food at three am and leave a rando here can you warn me??? Also i tazed him. but it was just my little one so i think he'll be fine. bring me some fries.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
