stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
My vagina is so ashamed right now. It won't even look at me.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
my mom told me that she didn't count me in the census because im a waste of life anyway.
no. you're not making a beach trip out of my abortion.
FUCK YOU CALIFORNIA. YOU DO NOTHING RIGHT. FIRST PROP 8 AND NOW THIS.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
Embrace your curves. Cuz we're too poor for a coke habit.
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
His water bottle is sitting on my coffee table like a monolith dedicated to the things he is not doing to my vagina.
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
Randomize
