I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
The only reason I give him head is because I know i'll get a back rub.
wow.
But it's a REALLY good back rub.
If I go there, please come with. It will accelerate the lesbian rumor but be totally worth it.
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
gave him road head on the way to his grandparents house. purposely didn't let him finish, the sexual tension over turkey was indescribable.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Using the only finger i can move, i calculated body mass, intake and time. It's mathematically impossible for me to still have this hangover at 9pm. I passed out at 8pm last night. Fuck vodka.
His voice is like having sex with hot chocolate and then suddenly you're pregnant.
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
she has no right to get mad at us for drinking during the wedding. she's the one that chose the bridesmaid dresses with pockets.
I had a good weekend too...although I cried about the dog in a drunken stupor last night...not one of my finest moments, but it's all water under the bridge.
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