My ass is singing 4 different tunes right about now... Taco Bell was a bad idea!
You know you're true friends when you can talk about what sexual diseases you may or may not have.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
just saw a man remove a wedgie from his lady's ass. who says chivalry is dead.
we live in such a classy society.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I don't have enough holes for all these australians
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I feel the need to point out that one of the items on my to-do list for the day is "don't throw up" I have no concept of normal
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
You graduated two years ago... You can't keep using spring break as an excuse.
Oh by the way, john gave me your shirt to return to you when I was at work today. I almost gave him his girlfriends underwear to return to her but figured it would be inappropriate.
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
Took an adderall for the first time in a few weeks. Spent 45 minutes peeling an orange TO PERFECTION.
So apparently I fell asleep sitting on the toilet last night while my drunk girlfriend sang to me.
Randomize
