why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
at first i was worried but she assured me her frail vegan body would have no chance at conception.
Until last night, I had never actually thrown up ON a sandwich
at one point i was feeding a guy sour cream chips and he made me make the "choo choo" noise as they were going in. \ni feel so much closer to him now.\n
The guy in the American Flag bikini was telling the women he was disgusted at the amount of alcohol they weren't drinking. Then it got ridiculous.
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
Apparently she almost had an affair at Outback Steakhouse, details to follow when I get home but the apple really doesn't fall far from the tree
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I hope no one at work can tell or smell that I have tequila in my hair and I haven't showered for days
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