Oww! U thought rug burn was bad! Fuckin carseat burn hurts like a mother!!!
Wtf?
Use the slutty part of ur brain.
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
He said he wanted to go to France " just to piss in the nice areas". I want to fuck him.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
Can rosie odonnell just not be a lesbian? Shes stressing me out, knowing we bat for the same team.
He's like a sexy bearded lumberjack who likes wine.. I can't lose..
My dog and I just went outside to pee together.
I swear I'm an adult. I say as I send my mom to go find me green lucky charms and lady gaga oreos
Randomize