I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
Party was cancelled. Me and my dog are high as tits. Wanna go roam the outlet mall?
From the guy that lifted you into a fan I'm sorry
I'm waiting at the bar and am surrounded by unattractive women.
You need to get here and rebalance this disturbance in the force.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
If she didn't have scissors in her hand I would have motor boated the fuck out of her when she was done cutting my hair.
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