drinking colt 45 because lando calrissian told me to
Definitely still drunk while signing the 'responsible adult' form at the hospital
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Think of something healthy and responsible. Now think of the exact opposite, let's do the latter
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
is that a sigh of girlish delight, or "sigh...I'm having a herpes outbreak'
Can't it be both?
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
maybe one of us should just pity fuck him and get it over with.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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