Chill out big head. its weird when girls look at dudes asses
YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
when my dick couldnt get hard she said "fly on little wing"
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
I just won 10 dollars from out chugging the bar tender and I found out that the baby aint mine in the last hour. I don't even care if l get laid tonight any more.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
My parents are coming to visit the 28th. How bad is it that I put a reminder in my phone to "hide sex toys"?
Randomize
