Sorry, can't come over. I have to spend time with my niece. Her Dad ignores her and I don't want her to have male attention issues like you.
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
Nope. Can't afford girlfriends. Still looking for the 25 year old bisexual tripled who owns a brewery or a casino.. the search continues....
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Had dinner with my ex husband. The box of wine is gone and I'm laying on the floor in my wedding dress. Where are you?!
Don't count me out just yet. Considering bartering a blowjob to see if that boy from work will take my shift.
Watching porn with a bag of marshmallows. Thats when you know you're stoned.
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Randomize
