I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
dude totally just got the jungle juice out of my white top. i am really ready to be a trophy wife.
Is it bad to go up to the security desk and ask them for the name of the guy I signed in last night? I have absolutley no clue
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Come find me, I'm the girl sitting alone in taco bell at 9 in the morning drinking concealed beer with a straw
I wish they made people sized litter boxes.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
Well there's only 4 people in my class, we've watched a video, the instructors encouraged us to start using cocaine and now we are on break.
It's been productive.
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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