is it bad that i regret hanging out with a girl tonight because that means i have less time to sit on youtube watching xmen cartoons?
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
I may also break bread with strippers. Because it is passover.
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I found a vibrator in my car and it's not mine...this is becoming a weird day.
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
And here i was gonna offer you a complimentary blowjob.
Well I'm just gonna sit here naked in this chair and whatever happens happens
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
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Jen's arm is stuck between a wall and her bed. She's naked and needs someone to go help her.
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
I seriously think I got run over last night.. My sides are bruised and I got a ride home in the limo from the office.
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
We couldn't find the paddle I had gotten so he just spanked with my tennis raquet