he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
Just saw a baby with a T-shirt that read "I am the result of my mother forgetting to take her magic pills". I can't believe they make shit like that.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
The cops walked in to class and arrested 2 guys for possession.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
I did nothing besides stay sober all night, I walked home to find max naked knocking cups off the counter with his cock lol
Would it be tacky of me to tell the two girls I just found out he's been sleeping with on the side that I've been having gay sex with him all semester?
I am officially now FB friends with my arresting officer.
Do you think dominoes pizza would deliver faster if I told them I just had shower sex and that always makes me hungry?
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
Sitting beside a stoned cat on the kitchen floor eating cheesecake with my hands...just a struggle
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