Christians are straight up FREAKS
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He told me he was ok to drive home. Then I found him face-planted in the parking lot.
I forgot how hot balto sounded
I even resorted to pole dancing with the street sign. I have an extra $20 now because I think people were paying me to leave.
Is it awkward to ask someone I've slept with to officiate my wedding?
I just had sex on a bear rug. My life is complete.
Drunk cheerio confetti may seem like a brilliant idea when your drunk, but believe me, the next day, its a horrible, horrible mess.
i told her i wanted to be the Neil Armstrong of her vagina,
I woke up naked with my work shoes on
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
How are they?
Amazing! These new boobs are going to break blouse buttons and wedding vows!
Randomize
