some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
do you think semen can infect my impacted wisdom tooth
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Would the comment "Down Goes Frasier" be too inappropriate at this time?
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
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