At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
Xanax induced break ups are the best. Since I'm a professional fiancee, I'm going to break up with them on Xanax from now on. It didn't hurt one tiiiiiny bit.
I acted like I was still sleeping as she gathered her stuff to leave.. that's when she let one rip
Highlight of my evening, pile of books falling onto me in front of people
The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Its a "sake bomb in the bathroom during class" kind of day.
Maybe next year when I'm 30 I will be over puking at lunch on Fridays. Maybe
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
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