Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
he also called and said i only cheated on you 8 times but they were all trannies
and someone in the background yelling "one was fat so that counts as one and a half"
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
I smoked weed with pregnant girl. I'm going to hell.
You can't just say things like "great depression theme party" and then not respond.
I tried to fuck this guy who I'm pretty sure has an erectile dysfunction
He slow fucked me. Doggy style. On a porch. You never slow fuck doggy style. Its a law. A LAW.
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I better make out with at least 3 princesses and 4 animals this weekend.
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
spent the night holding naked strippers up for keg stands and doing endless amounts of body shots. good game 8am final exam.
whats an extra semester when you've already been in college for 6 years?
Randomize
