so my mom told me to suck on something if I have to cough. so I guess blow jobs are ok
Just witnessed a walk of shame by a guy in a half gorilla suit. It's going to be a good day.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Plus you know he's just 2 semesters and 4 glasses of wine away from "experimenting" with some French major
How is it possible that I am in a completely different city, and there are 2 dudes here that I've banged? How????
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I threw up through my nose tonight. Happy cinco de mayo
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
hey man , the girl you brought home last night is in the kitchen puking in the sink and asking if she can have more shots of Whiskey....think i should give her a shot glass or send her home....