i get turned down more than a collar. where are the desperate bitches i need to crawl to them
Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
i'm not sure if i'm mentally prepared for this.. politeness? proper grammar? book reader ? this is a whole new meaning of the species penis for me.
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
We ended up sleeping in the emergency room for safety (you know, well lit, cameras..) and then an ambulance drove us to the train station around 4am. great last night in australia.
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Somebody really needs to come home and pick up the used condom from the middle of the wood room floor. It's blue, if that helps decide who comes - uh, home.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
Next think I knew I was pretty much using his penis as a microphone... No more playing Eminem during hookups
Last night, I listened to Aladdin on my ipod while I stole bread and cheese from Wal-Mart. I feel like you're the only one who'd be proud of me.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
You ruined the universe
Randomize
