So the last day on the vacation I woke up in the bath tub. My mom said she asked me during the night what I was doing and I said, "swimming."
But you know it's love when you find brass knuckles in the same box he keeps his Naruto action figures.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Just used water from the fish tank for the bong. Thank you fishy.
Santa was walking around downtown handing out stuff at the bars. He gave me a free eyebrow wax. I think he's trying to tell me something
Sometimes you get drunk and fall out of a car. I never said it was glamorous.
Oh I will totally be your beard, but on one condition I get to watch you and your boy friend have sex.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
I am literally this close to screaming out my window if anyone nearby was down to fuck. I am too damn horny.
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
my ex finally blocked me on all social media and tbh I'm only pissed because his roomate just got a puppy
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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