I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
"women exchanges sex for chips" on msnbc
damn even the hoes are getting hit by this economy
hooked up with a girl who spoke elfish last night..what up 8th grade lord of the rings fantasies
Dude..her orgasm sent her into a seizure...theres no joke here. It happened.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
decision: in honor of being in new orleans this weekend all my drunk texts will be en francais
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
I have to shower first, I forgot I peed on my feet last night...
When she sees your dick for the first time, tell her it glows blue when orcs are close
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
you're the only girl i know who can be too sick to walk to the kitchen and still have enough game to receive multiple orgasms
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Randomize
