put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Who would have guessed that on my moms birthday she'd have sex with the door open. :(
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
I'm drunk and you're awesome. let's stay this way forever.
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
Did I come home in a police car last night? id come downstairs to ask you but i dont think my legs work anymore
We might as well just set our livers out to sea on burning ships
Those thigh tattoos deserve the handsomest of grins between them. Dont settle.
Idk maybe I'll talk to him once he gets out of jail just to yell at him and get my strawberry ice cream back.
yeah i ran into him at the bar at 11pm. he started talking about engineering and the next thing i know it's 4am and i'm naked on top of him.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Same way I cope with everything else. With dildos, dunkin and depeche mode
Randomize
