Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(804): View more from Virginia

it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.

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(814): View more from Pennsylvania

Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?

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(978): View more from Massachusetts

i just walked by a road side game of beer pong? it's gonna be a long day

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(856): View more from New Jersey

part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.

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(254): View more from Texas

oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick

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(503): View more from Oregon

well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.

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(484): View more from Pennsylvania

We are getting high tomorrow and being statues at the cafeteria. Come find us.

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(708): View more from Illinois

Taylor Swift needs more songs about threesomes. I'm not sure she gets me anymore.

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(417): View more from Missouri

How was jagerbomb pong?

(314): View more from Missouri

It was like communism. Great in theory. Terrible when put into practice

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