I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
i have to get rid of the hedgehog.
Does it come with a cage?
yes. and food and toys.
i'll trade you an 8th for it
deal.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I demand visitation hours with the duck.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah, my new jeep also came with custom license plates that read 4SKIIN. Not "4 skin" but "4 skiing" thanks mom and dad
I ate shrooms on a frozen river in an ice fishing shack after a day of vics and beer and walked around on the river in a stupor. They made me bite the head off of a fish.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
It's Friday you fucking nerd of course I'm drunk.
I’m a women at a strip club dressed as post Malone
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