Paul doesn't remember going to the bar and slept on someone's porch...doesn't know whose porch...maybe near Howard U.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
so i just realized i am an alcoholic. I was making some tomato soup because im still sick, and put vodka in it. sad huh? lets go out!
dinner with the girl I motorboated last semester wasn't as awkward as I thought it would be
You could breast feed yourself wine!! This shit is genius!
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
Literally just inhaled three cinnamon rolls. Sara is staring. It was inhuman
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
I can get there in 20, one question, Drress Code? Stripper Lite (make up may require an additional 5-10 minutes), Suggestive Professor (professor Kamil's cleavage ain't got nothing on me), Daywear, Dyke (and trust me you ain't seen dyke), or Exactly What I'm Wearing Right Now. (all of the above may arrive under a coat and are subject to my level of sobriety. Which is currently like nonexistent).--xoxo you know you love me, Gossip Girl.
So my new thing apparently is getting wasted, showing people my slytherin socks and convincing them I'm slytherin..because why not
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
The tamale guy is fucking with me, I wanna sleep in he wakes me up; early wake-n-bake and he's late and I'm hungry
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