My ? Is...... Would it be sweet or creepy to take a girl on a first date to chigago?
creepy.
She threw up everywhere and is crying about a fictional character who died on Grey's Anatomy
I just found out I was conceived in a rehab facility... that's better than finding out your dad could be someone else right?
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
It's gonna be pretty hard to find a homeless person that takes crackers as currency.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Is percocet and coffee considered a balanced breakfast?
Every time I try to stand up the back of my head feels like a bunch of little elves are beating the inside of my scalp with their toy making tools. What disease could this be?
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I wouldn't call us friends exactly. Honestly I just hang out with him so I can hit on his girlfriend. They won't last long, and I'll be there to pick up the scraps
I woke up this morning cradling my vibrator like it was a baby
Definitely went down on him last night while he was wearing a cape. He randomly kept swirling it around me and "revealing me" in the mirror like a magic trick. I'm not even a little upset, it's fun fucking younger guys.
MY LIFE IS A TRAINWRECK THATS ON FIRE BUT SOMEHOW STILL MOVING, I HAVE THE RIGHT TO SCREAM OUTSIDE AT 2AM
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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