What drug did you take that made the cabinets scream at you?
At least my shower head will respect me in the morning.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
he just sent me a picture of his penis sticking through a piece of paper that he had drawn a stick figure with tits on it that said "you"
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
not that im pissed, but why are there two naked chicks in my bed?
I went in the hotel's jacuzzi fully clothed, threw up in the bathroom half an hour later and woke up naked next to Dr. Seuss' "Oh the Places You'll Go"
We haven't had hot water in our dorm all weekend. Do you know if there is any other way to wash off shame?
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
I just found a contact in my phone named "Nick from The Party". Who's nick?
Randomize
