ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
she was bad bro. like...id rather put my dick in a blender. twice.
I don't want to talk about it. He was like the Little Engine that couldn't get me off.
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
How is it I was the last to know everyone calls me tig ole bitties? Did y'all have a meeting about this that I wasn't invited to?
Celebrating anything "Eve" is never a good choice! I feel like my soul's been put in a blender on the "destroy" setting- in other news: Happy 4th of July
You may want to re-read your sent texts from last night. You were texting me about your "fire shits" spelled 6 different ways between 3 and 5:30 AM.
If we can put a man on the moon, I'm sure we can turn a pringles can into a bong.
I yield to the immortal wisdom of one ludacris, who famously wrote, "can't turn a hoe in to a housewife." Indeed, ludacris, indeed.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Did you just correct my spelling of a made up word?
No, I just was using your word in plural form
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
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