i saved all my weight watcher points for this alcohol
i'm pleased to announce i can now open a bottle of wine with my shoe if called upon to do so.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just read twilight to her over the phone, while in the bathtub, candlelight...i'd love to say no homo but that was so gay.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
We will let tequila do the talkin this weekend
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
One of your 'guests' left her bra in the kitchen.
Dude, does it look like any of the women I bring home wear bras?
Kid walks in and orders 24 Mcdoubles and 14 large fries, as he's handing me the money he tells me he lost at rock paper scissors so he had to do the munchie run.
i look like i'm walk-of-shaming but i'm really showered and re-clothed and rallying. i fool everyone
Randomize
