Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
And why did 3 people fail to stop me from literally getting a piggy back ride from the bar to his apartment?!
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Just had a 40 min argument about how many celebrity guest appearances on Sesame Street were court ordered for DUIs.
Not only have I fallen off the wagon, it ran me over and just kept going...
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
Basically she credited me and my dick pic for boosting the moral of all the Safeway workers
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
I just set up a proportion to calculate how much Jolly Rancher vodka I can make with the limited amount of Jolly Ranchers I have. Finally, real-life application of math.
I'm starting to think that Cosmic Steve ripped me off
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Randomize