U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
can "i'm close!" be our safe word(s)?
oh geez, wrong person.
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
we made out at a charity event. really i was helping the fight against aids...
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
Hey I came back and we made joints with the breathalyzers the cops left last night.
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Sometimes i like to think we arent living together next year and that im living with models that like to experiment but you ruin that fantasy time and time again
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
I bet you there is porn for people who get off on someone rubbing Chipotle on themselves
Okay well for one he didn't speak any english but before any happened he made me use the translator to consent
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