I have a very awkward question for you. Could you possibly take my black dildo. My mom wants to clean my room.
Congratulations on your moose knuckle.
Thank you. Really, it was an honor just being nominated.
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
Watching intervention at a bar. Who let this happen??
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
I call it my summer of slut; except summer lasts from May until December. It's been incredibly successful
You made everyone who was on the patio sit on the floor and join your "ship" because you were the Captain. It was cool though. You let me be your 1st Mate.
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
