this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Based on the pics I have taken of hookups while they were passed out or sleeping, I have scientifically concluded that no two vagina lips are the same. They are like snowflakes.
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
The cute guy in my class hurt himself and is on crutches. My first thought was "Good. He'll be easier to take down." Like he's a gazelle and I'm a dick tiger. What's wrong with me?
I forgot to tell you, the medics put you in a wheel chair. ( I kept telling you to cat daddy) oh you also gave everyone high fives for speaking English.
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
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