im never drinking mad dog again and i have your belt.
Do you know my vagina holds 14 pints of water?
You know your from las vegas when the girl on the stage in the strip club was in my US gov class senior year
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I had one glass of wine then passed out for 4 hours. It's like I'm having a quarter-life crisis.
I'm just chillin on the bathroom floor
Haha oh no
The bathroom floor is like my second bedroom on the weekends
its the first football sunday and my boyfriend isn't excited. this isn't gonna last unless he makes me snacks and brings me beer during the game.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
Why do we always have to be the people who get blamed for animal intoxication incidents?
Randomize
