Done. Eyebrows are waxed, entire body shaved
The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
i feel like im paying for every hangover i didnt experience last year as a freshman. thank you sophomore year.
On the one year anniversary of me loosing my virginity... thousands of people will be taking their pants of on subways all around the world
It's like a tribute to you being a slut
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
So I feel like I should have had a going away party for your dick. Complete with balloons and cake. Yeahh that's right. I'm gonna miss it.
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
Frankly, since I met you, I practically exist in a state of constant readiness for sex
you got drunk, told him he looked like shaggy and said 'I wouldn't show you my mystery machine for all the scooby snacks in the world'
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Pretty sure that I just proved those labels that say "non-flammable" wrong. totally unrelated, We just made your futon fly with a shitload of fireworks
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
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