stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
Turns out he's not gay. He just didn't know how else to say he's not into me. He just hit on my sister.
Im starting to realize why people dont masturbate while driving
no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
Jasmine is diving into bushes again.
On Friday, can we drink like its Civil Wars times and the doctor's coming to saw off our gangreen infected legs?
I know you're aving fun across the room but I can clearly see you getting a handy. It's not as "low key" as she promised. Also, why are you texting while she's doing it?!
You introduced yourself and she said "wow that's a long name" and you went "yeah well you should see my dick."
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Don't mention it
Just endorse me for cunnilingus on LinkedIn
help. his tongue is stuck. Its not what you think. Hurry.
Randomize
