Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
you handed me the dorito you were about to eat and told me to 'keep him safe' while you went to the bathroom
You texted me 'I am the leopard prince', with a series of pictures of you posing in what seemed like cat poses. you were not "a little bit" drunk dude..
You drink it until you puke in a vent one time and it's ruined forever.
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
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