Why are you at a bar in Connecticut?
Long story. One that now involves lots of delicious chicken wings om nom nom
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
There's some muscle relaxers in my bedside table. Sorry if my dildo is in the bathroom.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
Dude made his own urinal by punching a hole in the wall and pissing in it rather than waiting in line. That is the stuff of legends.
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
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